Hello everyone,
I thought I would try to describe the careers of the current Rangers players in terms of music albums. I attempted to find an album that fits a player’s career either in relation to just the album music, its historical significance, or its relation to a band’s overall discography. I have tried to pull from many genres and hope that there is something here for everyone. Each album description hopefully hits on a few key points of a player’s career. I have also included a special surprise for everyone at the end. For the albums (or a song from) that I can legally find a video of, the images are direct links to them so you can listen along if you’d like.[/text_output][text_output]
Goalies
[/text_output][line id=”” class=”” style=””]Hendrik Lundqvist- Led Zeppelin IV (Led Zeppelin, 1971)
An older album which followed up a less than stellar release of Led Zeppelin III (7th round pick), Led Zeppelin IV is widely considered one of the greatest albums of all time. Despite its age, the quality of music and the recognition of songs like Black Dog, Stairway to Heaven, and When the Levee Breaks, even almost 50 years after its release, attest to the incredible album that it is. There aren’t many people who hate this album and realistically, it will remain one of the greats for a very long time.[/text_output]
Ondrej Pavelec- Are You Real? (Beware of Darkness, 2016)
Like I’m not gonna lie, I like the album but it’s all about the name here. Is he real? Hello? Do we have even a backup? Why was he so good those few times we’ve seen him? I have so many questions.[/text_output]
Defense
[/text_output][line id=”” class=”” style=””]Ryan McDonagh- Tell Me I’m Pretty (Cage the Elephant, 2015)
This is just a continuation of good music being made consistently from CTE. Some people did not like the big change in sound between albums but it is still good even though it is changing with time. Cage has been around for a long time and they are still producing at a high level. And come on, Mac should be told he is pretty.[/text_output]
Kevin Shattenkirk- My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy (Kanye West, 2010)
Probably one of, if not the best, rated Kanye albums and certainly my favorite; MBDTF is a masterpiece of hip hop. In the beginning, it is asked, “Can we get much higher?” I am not sure that Shatty can now that he plays back at home for the Rangers. And honestly, this was every Ranger fan’s fantasy and that contract is beautiful.[/text_output]
Brady Skjei- SATURATION III (BROCKHAMPTON, 2017)
BROCKHAMPTON is finally gaining recognition for the talent they have. Every album is a fantastic work in of itself and they just keep getting better. I’ve also loved them from the start and will always be excited when they announce new work. Although I cannot attest to whether Skjei speaks fluent Spanish.[/text_output]
Brendan Smith- Nevermind (Nirvana, 1991)
A gritty, angsty, well put together album that sometimes loses itself. These things describe Smith’s play to me. When the songs are on, they are firing on all cylinders. But when they miss, they really miss. Nevermind has a few songs that everyone will always recognize and jam to, like Smith in the playoffs, but there are also other times you aren’t sure where it’s going.[/text_output]
Marc Staal- Woodstock (Portugal. The Man, 2017)
An album which seems like a lesser version of itself compared to the band’s previous works. Older fans who listened to Evil Friends and earlier works remember this crazy psychedelic and grungy rock group with a lot of heart. But now they seem less to those same fans. Newer fans will still think this album is great but missed out on the old days of Portugal. While the album isn’t bad it’s just that — less.[/text_output]
Nick Holden- And After That, We Didn’t Talk (Goldlink, 2015)
This album has flashes of being amazing. Spectrum is still one of my favorite songs but honestly, the rest of it falls flat and leaves me feeling frustrated. I want the spice and production quality that is on Spectrum on all of Goldlink’s tapes but yet, I am left empty and wanting.[/text_output]
Steven Kampfer- Lil Pump (Lil Pump, 2017)
What can I say, there’s one, maybe two good songs by accident on this album. Just like Kampfer, who is sometimes good by accident. Lil Pump is an ad liber who makes cool beats but lacks the ability to make a coherent song. Crazy and Back (feat. Lil Yatchy) have sick flows and beats but dear god I do not want to hear this album in its entirety ever again. But then there’s a group of people who hail Lil Pump as the savior of rap (or is that a meme? I really can’t tell any more).[/text_output]
Wingers
[/text_output][line id=”” class=”” style=””]Pavel Buchnevich- лучшее (ленинград, 2014) (Best, Leningrad, 2014)
Russian, exciting, little grasp of the English language, this album is high powered Russian Ska Punk hailing from St. Petersburg, home of SKA St. Petersburg. Most people who listen will find this amazing even if they can’t fully understand why. Some people (AV) hate fun and don’t like the high powered Russian offense or offensiveness in the case of the album. For awhile, these guys were banned from Moscow for being too offensive for the mayor’s liking. Sound familiar?[/text_output]
Chris Krieder- Hypnotize (System of a Down, 2005)
Edgy, fast and damn good at what he does. Lots of people will find this repulsive (the entire country of Canada) but the fans love this album. It starts off hot and stays hot for most of the time. There are some slower parts but what can you expect, it can’t stay crazy the whole time. Before Hypnotize was Steal This Album! which was not nearly as good and many people probably didn’t want to hold onto it, really. Maybe it’s why they wanted it to be stolen.[/text_output]
Mats Zuccarello- Songs for the Deaf (Queens of the Stone Age, 2002)
What a fantastic album. It tells a story of Josh Homme traveling through the desert and having weird radio stations as his only means of entertainment. Zucc has been with us forever through the good and bad times. I seriously can’t think of anyone with as much energy and gusto as this album. The quality is consistent throughout both the the faster and heavier parts, and the slower melodical pieces. No one hates Zucc.[/text_output]
Rick Nash- Fast Cars, Danger, Fire and Knives (Aesop Rock, 2005)
I think the title describes how dangerous of a player Nash is. He creates a lot of opportunities for his line mates and is consistent in his own zone. Aesop is well, verbose and I can’t fully understand what he is talking about, just like how I can’t fully understand how Nash does the dirty things he does to other team’s defences. Or why some people hate him so much. Jeez, the guy is older so his contract is wack, but it’ll get better.[/text_output]
J.T. Miller- Let Live & Let Ghosts (Jukebox the Ghost, 2008)
Riddle me this: You’re in a car with your 70’s rock dad, 80’s pop mom, your girlfriend who likes indie rock and your little sibling who can’t make a decision. What do you play for them? This album. You play Jukebox the Ghost. This is one of the most versatile albums I know of. What I mean by this is, everyone I have ever shown this album to enjoys it. J.T. Miller is also incredibly varied in his skills as we have seen just this past season. It is obvious that he and the album have a place that they are the best at.[/text_output]
Jesper Fast- Autumn of the Seraphs (Pinback, 2007)
Look, I think everyone forgets about Jesper Fast a little here. The kid is good and no one has any issues with him. I love that he can slot in and work well in any role he’s given. That is how I feel about Autumn of the Seraphs; its mostly unknown, but its good and always doing great things.[/text_output]
Jimmy Vesey- Untitled Unmastered (Kendrick Lamar, 2016)
Good album. Problem is, I can never remember what song I want to listen to, just like how I can never remember the things Jimmy Vesey are doing. He is in a similar vein to Fast, but rather than accidentally forgettable, he is always the same and I can’t pick things out about him. The difference being that Vesey still seems raw in his abilities, whereas Fast is more refined.[/text_output]
Michael Grabner- Exmilitary (Death Grips, 2011)
THIS ALBUM IS WILD. It’s insane. I’m not sure if Death Grips is sustainable but they keep going and I love them so much. Also, the dude is JACKED and ya know, jacked, ex-military, you get it. Thru the Walls is straight up what Grabner does to opposing defenses and I Want It I Need It is for every time he gets ANOTHER EMPTY NETTER.[/text_output]
Paul Carey- Everybody (Logic, 2017)
Its fine. It’s technically okay but I’m not happy that it’s only okay. That’s my entire opinion.[/text_output]
Centers
[/text_output][line id=”” class=”” style=””]Mika Zibanejad- Late Night People (Goldfish, 2017)
Two dudes who like hanging out and making fun music; that’s what I feel like Zibby does every day. He seems like a dude who would bump this before games to energize himself and stay positive for the guys. Yes, obviously it is an EDM album as the dude’s second love to hockey is music and DJing.[/text_output]
Kevin Hayes- Madvillainy (Madvillain, 2004)
Two men make up Madvillain just like how two players make up Hayes based on who he plays with and how he is used. The two guys in Madvillain became one incredible group, who eventually produced Madvillainy, similar to Hayes’ improvements this year. Also this is such a stoner album and have you seen Hayes’s tweets? Dude probably gets high and eats a whole pizza or something.[/text_output]
David Desharnais- Save My Soul (Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, 2003)
Jazzy, upbeat and a small album of only ten songs. A couple of the songs on it fit DD. The first is, You Know You Wrong, and I think that’s what DD thinks when AV misplays him. Second is, Save my Soul, where I think DD prays that he has to make it through another night on the first line, which he has been fine at but I don’t doubt it’s nerve wracking. This album is great but has specific places it can be played; you can’t bring jazz into an urban nightclub.[/text_output]
Boo Nieves- Escalator Music (Swelo, 2013)
Swelo literally came out of nowhere when he put out this album. The guy is a math teacher from New Orleans who likes to make music in his garage and doesn’t entirely care about popularity. And yet, he made a great album with genres all over the place and completely unexpectedly. This is Boo for me, out of nowhere and pretty good.[/text_output]
Honorable Mentions
[/text_output][line id=”” class=”” style=””]Alain Vigneault- A Different Kind of Truth (Van Halen, 2012)
THE TALENT IS THERE BUT IT’S BEING MISMANAGED. DAVID LEE ROTH PLEASE STOP THANKS.[/text_output]
Cam Talbot- Grown Up (Danny Brown, 2012)
Look at him go, I’m so proud. He’s a real goalie, everyone. Do you remember his first starts? It seems like so long ago.[/text_output]
Derek Stepan- Emotion (Carly Rae Jepsen, 2015)
I miss Stepan, run away with me Step, come back I miss you. Literally all the lyrics to the first song are the things I’d write here.[/text_output]
Dan Girardi- Megalithic Symphony (AWOLNATION, 2011)
Damn, this album is great; there is not a bad thing on it. And for a band’s first LP to be this good, was crazy. But they got worse over time, which made a lot of those who loved this album really sad. Eventually, it got to be too much and we had to let go but we will always cherish the memories of hearing this for the first time in the early days.[/text_output]
Annti Raanta- It Hurts (Bad Bad Hats, 2013)
Little tiny EP that’s good, makes you feel good and it hurts that he is gone. I wish I had more than 2 albums from BBH and I wish I had a little more Raanta.[/text_output]
Tanner Glass- Hooked on a Feeling (Blue Swede, 1973)
This whole album is an old fashioned feel good 70’s album. There are two fantastic songs on it too, being Hooked on a Feeling and I Didn’t Sing (In the New York Subway), of which really draw you in. The rest of the album is still fun and entertaining for a bit but is aggressively mediocre. You really wish it was as good as the two great tracks the whole way through because then it’d be a great album that puts its soul into everything.[/text_output]
Adam Clendening- American Boyfriend: A Suburban Love Story (Kevin Abstract, 2016)
This is a good album but it’s purely a jab at Ryan and Greg for how much they love Clendo. I wish more people knew Kevin Abstract because he really deserves recognition. Same goes for Adam.[/text_output]
Author: Amanda
New York born, Maryland raised, Minnesota hockeyed. In order: Rangers, Orioles, Gophers, Rockets, Ravens. I live in WISCONSIN now and will be reporting on college kids from time to time.